A Towering Disappointment

Let’s get this straight, I know that I’m lucky to eat out as often as I do and as well as I do; even luckier when we remember that I’m often a guest of a very generous father-in-law. Has this led to my developing a jaded palate or unreasonable expectations? I don’t think so – a cheap lobster & frites lunch at Chez Jules has been one of my best meals of the year, but I do get angry when restaurants take the piss; a case in point – The Tower, Edinburgh.


In case you don’t know, the Tower sits atop the National Museum of Scotland, it was opened as a sister restaurant to James Thomson’s Witchery (don’t get me started on the Witchery) and has always been styled as the more modern, cosmopolitan of the 2. It’s also been pretty reliable, expensive yes but quality food and service in exchange.

Something’s happened, and not for the better.

Recently, I was steered towards a starter of hand dived scallops with crispy pork belly and a yellow pea sauce. If I was the diver who’s gone down to harvest the scallops I’d have been furious at how they were treated, poorly cooked, served with a slick of dhal which was inferior to that of a bad Indian take-away and accompanied by something which may or may not have been pork scratching. Urgh. This cost £15.00. For a starter. The other starters were equally unimpressive.

Mains? I had guinea fowl which was catastrophically under-seasoned and served with bullet-hard pearl barley; father-in-law takes his steak medium well so no test of skill there but the accompanying béarnaise was poor with little flavour and the “thick cut chips” looked more like some roast potatoes I spotted in a kebab shop late one night.

The worst crime against customers however was the “rack of lamb” which my wife and mother-in-law both chose; if you buy a rack of lamb in, say, Tesco, you’ll get a piece of meat with 7 or 8 ribs for the princely sum of about £7, if you buy the Tower’s rack of lamb, you pay £24 for two very meagre chops, some braised shoulder the size of a £2 coin and some indifferent veg. I reckon the food cost was about £3.50 on that plate so they’re making some lovely margins.

The cheese was fridge-cold (and unidentified, the waitress didn’t even know what they were), the wine list holds little for those looking to spend less than £50 a bottle and our table was tucked in a corner which would have been better housing the hoover.

What really galls is the prices they have the audacity to charge, if you’re going to price your dishes along with those of Restaurant Martin Wishart or The Kitchin then they damn well better deliver on quality. The Tower didn’t.

Review - The Vinter's Rooms

The Vintner’s Rooms have been an Edinburgh institution since 1985, sitting in a stunning building underneath the Malt Whisky Society and pre-dating the Leith culinary renaissance and Restaurant Martin Wishart.


Recently Silvio Praino has bought into the business, bringing a wealth of wine expertise and arguably the best host in Edinburgh to the party. The website describes the food as “Mediterranean Cuisine” and I wonder if Silvio has brought any Italian influence to bear in the kitchen as well..

And so, to the food – Silvio suggested we place ourselves in his hands (I’m not sure if this was standard practice, our companions know Silvio). Hmm, just counted the owner’s name 4 times in 3 sentences, perhaps time to stop using it.

We kicked off with a Parsnip Velouté topped with a brunoise of veg; I do like veloutés but parsnip was a poor choice – it gave a grainy texture and not much to tantalise the palate. It was a bit under seasoned too.

Then came our starter of Sea Trout, served just seared so mostly rare and sauced with a reduced soy dressing, the tout was ordinary and the dressing needed to be reduced more and then spiked with caster sugar and lime juice (or ponzu if you really want to be authentic).

What followed was tortellini of braised green lentils with sautéed wild mushrooms on the side, an entirely misconceived dish – both lentils and pasta need some moisture to accompany them and this sauce-less offering was bland to the extreme. The mushrooms were lovely however, if only the tortellini had been stuffed with them and served with a generous slick of wine/butter sauce (stick some lentils in that if you really want).

Then the ladies were served Monkfish (not too well received) and the gents Veal; the veal was well sourced and cooked (though would have benefitted from a sprinkling of salt) and was sauced well but was accompanied by a bizarre concoction of pommes savoyarde (I think) served in a pie casing. Far too dry and ruined the tatties.

By now the ladies passed on desert and the gents enjoyed the cheese; this was by far the best course – well chosen manchego, pecorino (with chilli) and a great blue whose name I forget. Lovely, and the wines Silvio chose were perfect compliments.

Talking of the wine, Silvio chose a cracking Chilean Tarrango and an amazing Montepulciano (far better a MonteP’ than we’re used to); great choices from an amazing list.

So, conclusions? A crashing disappointment. Remember we were there on “friend” prices, we were charged only £10 per head for the first two courses, but we were also charged £28 each for the main – that’s more than Martin Wishart charges for some of his dishes and this certainly isn’t anywhere near his Michelin starred standard. This review feels a bit wrong, we were there as guests of friends of the owner yet we still felt overcharged for what we had.

I want to say nice things about the Vintners Rooms, Silvio is a lovely chap and great host and the building is stunning (the wine and whisky lists are beyond amazing with some real treasures for those who ask – and can pay – for them); but the food is just pants. Really, I can do better for a dinner party and as there was only 1 other table in the restaurant, I know I’ve cooked better and for more.

Sad really; we so wanted to like this and I’d love to help Silvio. Perhaps I could recommend a good Chef... Here’s a thought, isn’t Sean Kelly looking for a new role? Employ him and I’ll be there every other week.

Chez Roux at Greywalls

So, I’d been looking forward to visiting the new restaurant at Greywalls Hotel in Gullane, East Lothian, since it was announced a few months ago that it was going to be run by Albert Roux under his “Chez Roux” operation; I’d never been fully sold on Greywalls as a dining venue, it’s a truly stunning building but I’d always found both the food and service were just too dated to be enjoyable.


So the arrival of Albert could only help improve things, yes? Well, yes and no.

To start with the food was pretty good for the price - £245 or so for 4 of us, and that included £120 of wine and an automatic 10% service charge (I don’t like these but at least it’s not the more usual 12.5%) so we’re coming out at roughly £25 per head – that’s less than a main course elsewhere.

We kicked off with Crab Tian, Pike Quenelle and Pea Velouté with a Poached Egg; the Crab was pronounced “sublime” and from the little I got to try, it certainly was pretty nice, the Pike was nice but the recipient looked jealously at the Crab and the Velouté had good, clean flavours which could only have benefited from more confident seasoning.

Next along was Seabass for the ladies and Guinea Fowl for the gents, both cracking and certainly no seasoning issues.

And then we finished with the Omelette Rothschild and Crème Brulée; I have to admit that I wasn’t taken with the famed omelette, nothing wrong with the execution but the sweet, soft, egg-white texture just isn’t to my palate. The Crème Brulée was quickly demolished so must have been good.

So if the food was good, why isn’t this an improvement? It’s taken me a while to puzzle this one out, but I’ve concluded it was a mismatch between the styles of food and service; the food is really well executed bistro grub (and priced accordingly) but the service is stiltedly formal – the Velouté arrived in a copper pan and was poured over the egg and broad beans in the soup plate by a waiter (nice touch in a high-end joint but the effect’s lost slightly when the waiter splashes it over the rim). The staff are dressed in a throwback to the ‘80’s and the other diners are dolled up to the nines, suitable for Le Gavroche perhaps but a bistro? All in it made for a slightly uncomfortable atmosphere.

So I guess Dr Ross prescribes a more relaxed attitude, and perhaps a few more lower priced wines on the list; but will I go back? Certainly – it’s on my doorstep, cheaper than Ducks at Kilspindie and far better.

Review – Duck’s at Kilspindie

Dear Malcolm Duck,
I understand you are away watching the rugby this weekend (great result wasn't it?) and so I thought I'd drop you a note to let you know how Ducks at Kilspindie runs when you're not around to supervise.
I suppose we should all expect people to take their eye off the ball slightly when the boss is away, but when one is a paying customer should we be the ones expected to compromise? Well at Kilspindie it seems the answer is yes.
The meal had an inauspicious start with the restaurant manager greeting us with the wrong name and then, when leading us to the table, stopping in the bar to chat to another party. Leaving us to stand in the middle of the bar waiting for their conversation to end.
When we finally got to our table the situation improved, a delightful waitress (Helen I believe) and an interesting menu which suggested ambition; the wine list was good, if a bit too biased to the pricier end of the spectrum, but it did hold a gem in the form of a Chinon of decent age for only £19 so we can forgive that.
So, decisions made and order taken we found our starters arriving quite quickly, before the wine in fact, with a couple of plates being passed over my head to the diners on the other side of the table. Service faux pas aside, the Gravadlax was pronounced very nice, the crab and shrimp tian fair and the quail bland and under seasoned.
Mains came, again with plates passed across the table as if serving to a chimps' tea party, and the slow-roast pork belly was promptly returned due to burnt crackling. Now, I know that most blogging, and most especially food blogging is an act of vanity on the bloggers' part and that the wide majority really don't care about our opinions but please, if I care enough about food enough to write about it as a hobby, perhaps I know a little. I certainly know the difference between cooked and burnt and so was more than a little offended when the same plate was brought back a minute later with the offending carbon scraped and trimmed from the crackling with an accompanying explanation that it wasn't over done and that was the way pork belly is cooked. I love pork belly, it's a luscious, meltingly tender piece of beauty when prepared properly; at Duck's it wasn't prepared properly. It may have been cooked slowly but not slowly enough and at too high a temperature, the fat hadn't rendered and the meat was tough and chewy; the accompanying braised shoulder was the best thing on the plate but too small, the dauphinoise potatoes underdone and the roasted shallot puree would have been a fitting sauce had the pork been edible.
The others all had the Duck (when in Ducks etc..) and found it uninspiring, not as tender as it could be and under seasoned.
Had dessert not been included in the carte (3 courses, £28) we'd probably have left at this point, but as it was paid for: the Ice-Cream was "acceptable", the apple tart was a semolina cake, the chocolate fondant underdone and burst before it hit the table and the cheese had been pre-cut and was beyond its best (with wrinkled, brown grapes accompanying it).
Funnily enough, we left on a positive note when our main waitress, Helen, embarrassed about the quality of the meal, asked for my card so the proprietor could contact me. I wonder if he will.
As we left, we noticed two chaps in chef's tunics sitting with a couple of pints at the bar; now I'm not certain they were the chefs from Ducks, but as the meal seemed prepared without love or pride, perhaps by someone who just wanted to get things done before starting their Saturday night, I have my suspicions. At £208 (plus tip) for four I'd rather not feel like an impediment to someone's drinking time.
So, will we be back? As Duck's at Kilspindie is the closest restaurant to me then I'm sure I will, probably when snow or storm have prevented me from making it into Edinburgh where I'll get better food and service for the same price.
Yours etc.
Ross
The Itinerant Appetite

Review - Restaurant 21212

On Wednesday I attended the opening night of Paul Kitching's new operation, Restaurant 21212 and it was really rather good; the restaurant is the ground floor of a Georgian Townhouse (the old 3 Royal Terrace for those who remember) with a drawing room and private dining area on the 1st floor and plush rooms above. It's been decorated in sympathy with the period features yet has a contemporary edge; it feels as effortlessly stylish as Per Se coupled with a relaxed and welcoming ambiance.

Anyway, we arrived to a warm welcome and were invited to repair to the dining room for some opening night Champagne, all very civilised. It was here that we saw Paul popping in to speak to the waiters, checking they were ready for the night ahead; he looked understandably anxious but still made time to say hello.

The menu was as billed, a choice of two starters, a soup, two mains, a cheese course and two desserts; bread was offered which was stuffed with pistachios, dried fruit and curry notes, I found it lovely though my wife, who doesn't like dried fruit, was a bit disappointed in the lack of choice. Technically it was great, light and airy, it excited the palate without being filling.

To start I had the Chicken BLT while the rest of the table opted for Scallops with "seven peas". The Chicken was a wonderful deconstruction of an otherwise indifferent sandwich, the distinct flavours all worked together and were stunning individually. The Scallops were almost as nice, I suspect they were butter-poached as they were plump, succulent and scallopy, the "seven peas" seems to be peas prepared in seven ways, most successful though my wife and mother-in-law felt some of the peas were too hard, I tried a couple and suspect they may have been dried.

Next came the soup, it was cauliflower, carrot and apple with a slice of salami and, randomly, a confectionery apple string; for all this was the stand out dish of the evening, every mouthful brought a different combination of flavours that were a wonderful symphony in ones mouth. Seriously, I can't rave enough about this, equally I can only hint at the depth of flavour - as it constantly changed it would take far too long to describe.

For the mains I opted for the Turbot and Chorizo while the others had the Beef. The Turbot was as good a piece of fish as I've had in a long time, accompanied by lentils, caperberries, a baby chorizo and a couple of sauces which I couldn't even identify but were wonderful (am I beginning to overuse that word?), the lentils were slightly underdone for my taste but didn't bring the dish down. The others enjoyed the beef, it was served with what looked like some gremolata and they reported further lemon hints coming from what they called "the white stuff", not too technically helpful but they loved it.

Until the cheese came, all conversation at the table was suspended when the dishes arrived, only to resume while waiting for the next course. I would say we fell silent in reverence at the altar of Paul Kitching, but that might be a bit too melodramatic. It was seriously good though.Anyway, the cheese course allowed us to eat and talk, there was a great selection of 10 British and French cheeses served with porridge biscuits and a couple of others which I ignored. Can I just commend 21212 for having this as a separate course and for having it in the correct place (jamais le sucre avant le sale).

A pre-dessert came out of coconut and porridge infused milk, served in paper shot cups from a cute cow-shaped milk jug; this was great and fun, the flavours developed in the mouth like those of a good wine with the coconut surging and then ebbing to leave a delicious oatyness. Not too impressed with the paper cups though, they do look like something you'd find containing ketchup in an Ikea canteen, shot glasses would be preferable.

For dessert I had a baked custard which was flavoured with cumin and caraway and loaded with sultanas and kumquat and which was accompanied by a raspberry and linseed trifle; both dishes packed a flavourful punch that I'm still salivating over. The rest of the table enjoyed cheesecake and a fiery ginger sorbet that was so well received I didn't get to try any of it.

We had to leave at this point, our substitute babysitter having a time limit, so we didn't have time for coffee but Katie kindly presented both my wife and mother-in-law with some bon-bons to take home. I've eaten my wife's as I'm writing this, they are unctuous and mellow and could almost have converted me to dark chocolate. Fiona's going to kill me when she finds them gone.

Anyway, in summary: Restaurant 21212 is fantastic, Paul's dishes are going to challenge the culinary status-quo in Edinburgh by offering intelligent and complex flavours that excite the palate, all done with humour and a deft and skillful had. Even at Per Se, I only had one dish that made me this excited, at 21212 I had 5.The wine list is rather good with some interesting bottles there, though I do wonder if some of the mark-ups may be more London than Edinburgh (I'm thinking of a £60 bottle of Frank Phelan here, it was only a 2005 and I'm sure the last bottle I bought at retail was £17). The staff are pretty much faultless, welcoming and attentive but informal; they are really quite knowledgeable and seem to be proud of where they work. Justifiably.

On the down side, this was an opening night and there are a few things I think we'll see tweaked over the next weeks and months, lack of choice in bread, some of the cutlery is a bit more style over substance - I'm thinking of the two pronged forks that the others were given for the beef in particular and I don't think the room is large enough to be served napkins from a tray, it was nice but perhaps just impractical.

Is this worth £60 per head? Certainly.
Is this deserving of stars? Definitely 1, a few tweaks and possibly 2.
Should people go? Yes, but not too many of you, I always want to be able to get a table.

Review - Pani Solinska

Talk about an itinerant appetite, I set off for lunch with one of my regular chums, heading firmly in the direction of a new Korean restaurant that's opened in Edinburgh and we ended up in a Polish cafe. Not that there was anything wrong with the Korean joint, we just managed to walk past it, engrossed in gossip and were too hungry to head back.

Now I'm not a huge fan of the Polish food you tend to get in the UK, I normally find it too stodgy and with confusing flavours; certainly more suited to a winter's dinner than a spring lunch but chummy's blood sugar was dropping and that makes him grumpy, so hey ho...

No bad thing either.

Anyway, the cafe is a clean, modest but welcoming place which offers a range of dishes and sandwiches, mainly variations of protein on a theme, with a take away option as well. We opted for a tasting platter of Polish meats (£7.50) which came with a selection of homemade salads and a "Polish Soft Drink", a Pierogi - home made dumplings filled with sauerkraut and topped with fried onions and sour cream and a portion of sauteed potatoes with herbs and garlic.

The platter was nice with a decent selection of charcuterie and the salads were in reality some great pickles, the best was a sweet carrot and cabbage pickle which I've already tried to recreate. The dumplings were lighter than expected and had a nice balance and depth of flavour, the accompanying onions were slightly oily but nicely cooked. As for the sauteed potatoes, they were a bit dull and pasty, not parboiled therefore hard in the middle and the only discernible herb was dill which is, in my view, a bit dull.

Perhaps I'll leave the puns to someone else.

Anyway, the service was good and attentive with an authentically Polish waitress changing my mental image of Polish women to the better (much to the better).

The bill came to £21.45 for 2 mains, 1 side, 1 beer and 2 weird yet pleasant carrot and strawberry juices.

Not a bad place for lunch to be honest, though I'd have doubts about it as an evening venue. Do you want me to score it? i always think score are a bit trite, but if you want me to I will.